Saturday, April 2, 2016

Mom's Decisions

Good morning,
As I sit here this morning the sun is shining bright, first in a few day's where it feels like a Spring Day. As I posted the other day, mom's been having trouble going to the bathroom. A result of colon cancer is that tumors develop in and along the colon. Mom has only 18" left anyway and when she had her last surgery, they found tumors in her stomach and around her colon. She's on day 9 of not being able to go to the bathroom. This of course is most likely the result of a tumor on the outside of her colon narrowing the "passage" way not allowing stool to pass like it should. This causes lots of pain and other problems. The only way to "fix" this particular problem is a surgery to remove that particular tumor or add a bag. The problem is we don't know if it's one tumor or many or if a surgery would actually fix anything. Even if we fix this particular "issue" there are plenty more. Fine motor skills that are not working the right way, vision that is going, difficulty swallowing and pain that's harder to control. Mom has decided that there will not be an end to the surgeries that are needed to control the spread of the cancer.  With this news, she's decided not to have any more surgeries.  This decision will lead to a progression of problems with an eventual likelihood of sepsis being the final event. Mom has asked us to please just help her stay as comfortable as possible with pain medication and enjoy the time she has left- which the nurse feels will be within the month.

She wants to continue to have her event this next weekend because she feels it will be the last time she is able to see her friends.

She doesn't want hospitals, surgeries, or tubes or artificial treatments... So, our new task will be to keep her as comfortable as possible.

This was a hard decision for her to make and we ask that everyone honor her wish to be made comfortable. Pray that we can keep her comfortable and that she can find some relief and comfort. She is scared as anyone would be, so encouragement would be best, cards or messages are always appreciated.

I don't know what more I can say this morning except we are going to try to live as much as possible in the next few weeks and handle each day as it is presented to us. She has much love for her friends and wants everyone to understand that this was a choice she's prayed about and thought about and feels is the best choice at this time.

It is not easy for those of us who love her to know that our time is growing shorter and that each day will bring a new challenge of how to handle things.

We thank everyone who's been staying in touch and sending encouragement so far.

10 comments:

  1. Please give her a big hug from me. My heart is breaking! Prayers for all of you.

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  2. Dana, you really have a talent for writing! I continue to wish you mental and physical strength to handle all your stress.

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  3. I cannot imagine what you are going through, Dana. My mother's DNR decision after her heart attack was hard to imagine, but thankfully she only suffered 2 days before she passed. Your continued witnessing of your mom's deterioration must be hard to bear....but you are undoubtedly one of thee most strongest women I've ever met. I pray for even more strength these coming days and weeks. <3

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  4. Awe... praying for her comfort... please hug her for us..I would travel if I could but the chemo makes it impossible (been on daily chemo for 21 weeks possibly till Nov ) tell my cousin I love her... we are praying for all of you!

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  6. Praying for y'all. Hugs to each of you. Blessings, Melissa

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  7. Praying for y'all. Hugs to each of you. Blessings, Melissa

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  8. Praying that the Lord will give all of you wisdom, strength, and His peace. He loves all of you and will keep you in His loving arms, He will never leave you nor forsake you. Keeping all of you in my prayers.

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  9. i'm praying with thoughts to keep you all strong. This is something i just went through with ralph not that long ago. Love Mary Ann

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