Wednesday, April 27, 2016

Praying for an end

Mom's trip to the hospice house did not go well. She was in a lot of pain and it took a tremendous amount of pain medication to get her under control. There is still a higher ceiling we can get to in order to control her pain, but we are 1quickly getting into that range. She's starting to make plans for who get's what when her time comes. I have danced this dance before and I know that this means the person feels as if their time is growing shorter. She's also told me several times and has said she's prayed several times that she has prayed to God to ask him to just take her home. She's tired of hurting and tired of the pills and knows that both are only going to increase from here on. We chatted this morning and she said she felt like she had made amends to those she needed to and wanted to make sure I thought she was okay with everyone. I told her she had done what she needed to and that anything left was up to the people themselves. She said at this point she wanted to be done and felt like those she was concerned about was up to them to find their own peace and their own forgiveness. It was a tough conversation because it feels like it's her time whenever the Lord calls her home, she's ready to go.

I would just say to all her family and her friends, if you have something to say to her , go ahead and say it. I feel like only the person who sick knows when their time is nearing and I get that feeling from her. It was a hard morning for me and tough to get through. She said she's tired and I feel strongly that once someone decided their tired and done, that it's not long after for them to make their journey home. I feel alone surrounded by people and overwhelmed by what comes next. Trying to keep my family going, myself going facing surgery and mom's future is so unknown.

All my love, 
Dana 

https://www.gofundme.com/ShirleyJackson



4 comments:

  1. She did tell me when I was there also that shes ready to go. Its not easy to hear or watch. I didnt want to leave so soon, unfornately I had too.

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  2. She did tell me when I was there also that shes ready to go. Its not easy to hear or watch. I didnt want to leave so soon, unfornately I had too.

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  4. Shirley, you are loved by so many, including me. God is calling you home. May you find peace and may your family only remember the good times. Sending prayers always

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