Tuesday, May 3, 2016

A life ended the way she wanted

Tonight, my beautiful mother moved on from this life to the next one.  Whatever was waiting for her on the other side of this life, she's there having a great time now!  On Wed she wanted to speak to me, we talked for a long while and she told me she was tired of hurting, tired of pills and tired of waiting for the next pain to come. She said I am done. I told God unless I had more to go here, to let me come home. On Thursday morning, she woke up in a great deal of pain.  She called me in and said, Please make sure that when it's my time, I go out with as little pain as possible. We chatted a bit more about some things that at the time seemed like they were not a big deal. Then, my mom took a nap and never really woke up. I gave her her pain medication and she kept telling me she was still hurting, I gave her the max we were allowed to give her and she then nodded off again, only this time, she was not to wake up anymore. I noticed that evening that she was not rousing, wouldn't respond to my questions or stimuli. I called my family and let them say good-by, then we all set up camp near my mom, I slept in bed with her while others slept in the floor, on the couch, sitting in chairs. Each day there was less and less response from her, Each day I never left her side except to run to the bathroom and back. I held her hand, braided her hair and spent 4 days feeding her medication through a syringe and wiping down her face, turning her, talking with her and praying that I was doing all that she asked from me. Today after 4 day's, she drew her last breath with a good bit of her family with her. I holding one hand and Al the other. It was as peaceful as watching someone take their last few breaths could really be.  No, I haven't stopped crying yet and it really seems surreal at this point. Why I am here again what seems like so soon after burying my dad.

I meet with the funeral director in the morning to make plans and work on getting my brother here from Washington.  "plans"  how do you plan out the box that you are going to put your mom in and then into the ground. Plans for flowers and more stuff than my brain can think of right now. It's really hard for me right now.




https://www.gofundme.com/ShirleyJackson
                                                         

Good=bye momma, please know that I did everything I could for you and I hope it was enough. I love you and I am glad you are not hurting anymore! 

9 comments:

  1. I'm so sorry for all of you to be going through this again so soon. We will continue to pray for all of you and pray that you will continue doing the best that you can. Rest assured that she knew that you were doing the best you could for her. Love you all ❤️ Now try to get some rest!

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  2. I'm so sorry, sweetie. Treasure the gift of time you were able to have with one another these past few months. I'll check in on you tomorrow.

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  3. I'm so sorry, sweetie. Treasure the gift of time you were able to have with one another these past few months. I'll check in on you tomorrow.

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  4. I'm so sorry, sweetie. Treasure the gift of time you were able to have with one another these past few months. I'll check in on you tomorrow.

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  5. I'm so sorry, sweetie. Treasure the gift of time you were able to have with one another these past few months. I'll check in on you tomorrow.

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  6. Hey friend
    We are praying for you and all the family , we all love all of you and are so sorry for your loss and heavens gain. We will
    Continue to pray and we send all our love
    From
    Dwayne Bristow
    And the whole Bristow family

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  7. You and your family are a living testament to the kind of "love" Shirley infused in everything she touched. She is a great lady and I am grateful to have known her for such a short time. She loves you all so much! Blessings to you and your family! <3

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  8. Dear one.... I couldn't finish reading because I can't see through the tears. But it sounds like you did everything & anything to make your mom's last days the best they could be. I'm honored to have known your mom ,even though it was only through fb. I have some of the most beautiful stones made by your mom's talented hands. My thoughts & prayers are with you in this heartbreaking times, even though you know she's in a better place &without pain. Comforting healing prayers going up for you &your family.may the angels wrap your in their arms. <3 kim j roane

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  9. Dear one.... I couldn't finish reading because I can't see through the tears. But it sounds like you did everything & anything to make your mom's last days the best they could be. I'm honored to have known your mom ,even though it was only through fb. I have some of the most beautiful stones made by your mom's talented hands. My thoughts & prayers are with you in this heartbreaking times, even though you know she's in a better place &without pain. Comforting healing prayers going up for you &your family.may the angels wrap your in their arms. <3 kim j roane

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